Today, in the spirit of Barbara, I thought I'd write up a little story documenting what happened to me in the elevator the other day... By the way, Barbara is a good friend of mine who writes the most geniusly (is that even a word?) funny stories about her life and posts them on her MySpace Blog.

I work in an office complex. My company only owns the second floor, and down in the basement of this building, there are some tunnels that connect this building with the others in the complex. In these tunnels there are vending machines. So it's close to midafternoon, and I was feeling the need for some chocolate. I get my dollar bill and head to the basement via the elevator. As I get to the basement, there's a subdued ringing sound, and I think, "That's never happened before. I wonder what that sound is? So I'm looking around, and I realize that the emergency voicebox is ringing. About the same time I realize what it is, the ringing stops and some woman says, "Hello? Hello?"

I say, "Hi?"

"Is this Woodlands?" She asks.

"Yes, but it's the elevator."

"But is this Woodlands?"

"Yes, but you've called the elevator."

"I'm looking for Woodlands."

"Well, you've called the building, but you're talking to me through the emergency phone on the elevator." She must be a few crayons short if she's not getting this...

"I'd like to speak to reception please."

"I'm really sorry, but there are no buttons on this phone, and even if there were, I don't know the number for reception."

"But could you please just give me reception"

Very slowly: "You've.. called... the... emergency... phone... in.. the... elevator." How many times do I have to tell this woman?

It seems to dawn on her that I don't have the means to help her. And by now I've been to the basement, and then ridden the elevator all the way up to the 7th floor and stopped to let people on and off. They must think I'm a total nutcase, talking to the voicebox.

"I've just called the number in the phonebook," she says.

"Well," I say. "Maybe you should try information, instead, because this is the wrong number, clearly."

"Okay, but could you give me the reception desk?"

Seriously? ELEVATOR! There was no way to hang up on the lady, so I pushed the Basement button and wrode the rest of the way down listing to her say, "Hello? Hello? Is this Woodlands? Is anyone there? I need Reception."

I took the stairs back up.

I need a friend

This morning, as I was hanging out somewhere between being asleep and getting up, I composed this awesome blog inside my head. It was all about Seasonal Affective Disorder, which I think I have, and my apology to anyone I may have offended with my last blog. Of course, with all great things composed at just such a time, that amazing piece of literature has disappeared into the nether reaches of half sleep. So I'll do my best to get the general ideas across...

I made some sweeping geralities a couple of days ago. As with every situation in which stereotypes are made, there are a number of people who don't fit. Please, if you live in Utah, don't take offense. I am simply frustrated with the fact that, since I graduated from school, I've not met anyone that understands me. I generally feel more irritated with life when it's cold outside, and lately, it's been so cold it can't snow.

I'm still feeling incredibly isolated. Last night, for example, my friends and I decided to watch a movie, and we all threw titles out there, and vetoed each other's suggestions. Finally, I got frustrated and went to take a shower. When I came back they had started a movie I had previously vetoed. This happens all the time. Earlier last week, I wanted to make this great, healthy, orange chicken recipe for dinner, but my friend/roommate, with whom I share groceries, really wanted Chinese Chiken Salad, so we had that instead.

My roommates don't even know me.

I can't be myself, or do things I want to do, because I'm concerned with the feelings of my roommates and friends. We do things they choose, and listen to music they like, and eat where they like the menu. I like Star Trek, Alias, podcasting, classical music, playing video games, reading when it's cold outside, and going to the movies. But I can't like any of that stuff around them because they look at me like I'm a geek or a little kid, like "Nicki, you should have grown out of that stuff years ago." I mentioned once to them that I used to go to movies all the time by myself, because I like movies, and they kept acting like I was nuts. Last night I thought about being forceful, and voicing my opinions a little more explosively, but since I've never done that with these girls before, I thought I might alienate them. Because, of course, after all is said and done, they are my only real close friends in Ogden. So instead, we watched a movie I didn't want to watch, and afterwards, I went downstairs and threw a silent temper-tantrum. And in my frustration, I did a load of laundry because I had no clean jeans to wear to work today. But I wasn't focused, so I didn't remember that my now useless cell phone was in the pocket of my jeans until this morning, when I pulled my clothes out of the dryer... Just one more thing to add to the growing haystack I'm carting around I guess.

Then I got to thinking about my mood and how I never feel this frustrated or irritated during the summertime. I think I may really have an addiction to sunshine. And during the winter time, there isn't any sun, or if there is, there's no heat from it. I've always half joked about having seasonal affective disorder, but I think, in all seriousness, that it's a major source of my problems.

...

...I just want someone I can spend quality time with...

feeling isolated...

Do you ever feel like you're surrounded by small people? Not small, like size, but small in views. I was driving into work today and thinking, as only a one hour commute can force me to do, and I came upon the realization that the problem with living in Utah is that so many of the people here have no concept of a world larger than the small town they grew up in, and yes, I include Salt Lake City as a small town... The 300 or so people that make up the daily community of their lives are all they know and, for the most part, all they want to know. Life for my roommates, for example, is about the next singles activity, the next date, the next boyfriend. They go from class to class and are solely focused on thier own small lives... The world is so much larger than all of that.

I lived outside of this state for most of my life. In fact, I lived out of the country for several years, even. And this could have something to do with the perceptions I have of the world, but I'm not even sure that matters, because one of my roommates lived in France for 2 years while she was in high school, and she is just as limited by her world as anybody else I know.

Not that everyone in Utah is limited. I know plenty of people who aren't. My Aunt Jerry, and her daughter, Jenny, for two, are open minded. And I'm sure that there are scads of people outside of Utah who can be every bit as narrow minded about thier lives as anyone else.

Now that I'm thinking about it, all the poeple I know who aren't limited by their lives were students of the arts. Barbara and her Latin/History/Library Science degrees. Jana and her English/Library Science. Jaymi and her Art degree. Myself with English. Perhaps we have a bigger perspective because we've studied other people's perspectives. Most of the people I know here in Utah are Education majors. They grew up wanting to be teachers, so when they got to college they became teacher majors, and when they graduate, they'll teach in the same elementary school, junior high, or high school they graduated from. It's all they know, and all they care to know.

Digressing for just a minute... (don't worry, I'll tie it back in by the end).
I'm have a serious affair with technology. I think it rocks. I can't get enough of it. I'm hooked by all the little gadgets and toys they're coming up with nowadays. I want one. And it doesn't even matter what it is, but I want one. The coffee table computer touch screen, the tablet PC, a wireless electrical system, the wireless waterproof iPod and earphones. They have all kinds of internet applications, like the capability to access your own personal computer, from your work computer, or vice versa, that I can't even begin to describe in such a short amount of space. I follow it all, from rumor to development to general release... I'm addicted. I'm so hooked that I want to get involved.

There's a whole new medium of communication out there call podcasting. For those of you who don't know, podcasting is something akin to radio broadcasting. It's an online radio show, but instead of a live timed show, where you have to tune in at a certian time or you miss it, podcasting is something that can be downloaded anytime, and listened to whenever you want. Podcast topics are usually so specialized that they appeal to a certain kind of limited audience. Whole communities of like-minded individuals have sprung up around these podcasts. And I want to be part of it. More specifically, I want to be in the center of it.

My friends don't get that. They tease me because I like Star Trek, Alias, and Lost, and because I listen to podcasts that make me smarter, and they call me a geek, which I'm okay with most of the time... The problem is, I'm surrounded by people who don't get me. They don't get who I am and what I'm interested in. They have no concept of the larger world out there; that people are connecting on a global scale and that it's not just about who you can see and touch anymore, but about who can hear, and talk to, and connect with anywhere in the world. Ideas are being shared at a rate and scope like never before. It's amazing. And they're oblivious. It's like things were 200 years ago when literacy was the new thing. Some people refused to learn, thinking it was just a fad. But it's not the case. The information age is here and it's staying.


...why won't my friends get on board?...